While spending the weekend with my family down in South Beach, my wife and I decided to meet up with one of our close friends. She was also in town to attend the Sleepless in Miami event. After watching people dance on the side of a building, we decided to go eat a snack. They also wanted to drink, so we headed towards Espanola Way, which is one of the cutest streets in Miami Beach. While walking down Espanola Way we were accosted by a waiter at a restaurant named Hosteria Romana, who wouldn't leave us alone until we ate. I hate when places leave people outside their restaurants (unless they are crazy hot girls like on Lincoln) telling you to "come eat come eat, is good, is very good." Since it was late and there weren't many other choices if we walked by Hosteria Romana, we decided to give it a shot. What a terrible mistake that was, in my opinion.

Our waiter was named Rocco, and he was nothing short of rude. He seemed rushed, which was extremely exaggerated since there was only one other table eating there and another server seemed to have them under control. Rocco, literally threw the menus down on our table, almost scolding us when we didn't immediately decide what we were drinking and if we planned to eat something on top of just the drinks. Since he talked with his hands, I am quite shocked he didn't hit anyone with his swinging arms. When we didn't decide quick enough for him if we only wanted drinks, he took away the drink menus, and pretty much threw down food menus for us to look at. One of us (I forget who) asked if we could possibly obtain the drink menu again since she actually wanted a drink after all. Somehow Rocco completed this amazing task and gave us both menus at the same time. So utterly nice of him. The server should have just gotten the other menu and none of this would have happened.

So we finally decide to order, which looking back, I wish we never did. Rocco probably hasn't mastered the English language yet, since he kept pushing meat on someone who told him she was a vegetarian. I ended up ordering a plain pie, and couldn't even go to the bathroom to wash my hands before this pie came rushed out. As many of my readers know, I don't enjoy having basil on my pizza. It is just a personal preference, and I know many might find that odd. I specifically asked for no basil twice, making sure the rushed Rocco understood me. NO BASIL! I am sure by now you could guess that the pie came out with basil on it.

The food runner cuts the pizza for you at the table at Hosteria Romana, which I guess they think adds some type of fanciness to this place. You would think Rocco would notice me picking off the basil while the runner cut my pie, and say "excuzi signore, I madea mistakea, leta me goa getta youa a newa pie" (just having fun). He just watched me pick it off and said nothing. I actually found the whole cutting my pizza for me at the table to be annoying.

This pizza was way too undercooked, I mean some of the cheese wasn't even melted. You can see it in the picture below. How could any pizza maker with dignity server this pie to me. It was a soupy mess, that would probably get him thrown out of Italy for making it. Who knows, maybe this is the case, and that is how he ended up in Miami Beach.

The sauce had some chunks and I couldn't even hold the slice up. It was soupy. The cheese tasted very fresh, at lease the few bites that had melted cheese on them, and was the only good part of this thing that they tried to pass off as pizza to me.

To add icing on the cake, they took my pizza away from me without even asking if I was finished. I had two slices left. At this point I was too disgusted to say anything to our server, as I just wanted to get out of there and write this review, if my fingers didn't slip off the keyboard from the disgusting amount of flower that was on them from the excessive amounts the pizza maker applied to this slop. In my opinion I would never go back to Hosteria Romana, it was an awful experience.

By the way guys, the whistling and comments to passing by pretty ladies was just childish and insulting, it must be extremely uncomfortable for these unsuspecting women to be treated in the manner the servers treat them as they walk past.

Hosteria Romana in South Beach Miami gets 2 out of 8 slices